The Bureaucracy Game
Dec. 18th, 2025 12:44 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no_apologies(Mood: Epic. Snarky. Political Satire. Genre: Old-school Emo Punk that features a saxophone. The song needs to be rooted in punk and in a jazzy type of vibe.)
[Intro]
[carnival music]
[speaker is a cartoony clown character]
"Helloooo! Welcome to Customer Service Hell. T.M."
"...My name is Clarence P. Bureaucrat III..."
"How may I help you today?!"
"Well? What do you want? Don't dawdle. There's a line of a million other shitizens--I mean customers--who have their own important errands to attend to!"
"Would you like to hear about one of our policy options...? No? Well too bad! You're hearing them anyway!"
"Policy #47-B: All customer requests must be submitted in triplicate...by hand... And only on Tuesdays... And it's not permitted for you to use any pencils. It has to be blood-inked parchment."
[high pitched maniacal laughter]
"Ahahahahahaha!"
[spoken in glee]
"Now, enjoy your waiting time! It may be 72 hours... or maybe forever!"
[Verse 1]
The board already set.
A massive complex wreck.
The rules are so strict,
For anyone who'd want to win!
Read up on the instructions all you'd like,
The makers have their own, out of spite.
Dressed all classy, behaving on their best,
While deliberately screwing you in jest.
They'll allow you to play,
As you'll learn the hard way.
It's been rigged for so lonnnnng,
Way before you were borrrrrrn...
[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, how can this be?
You ask so furiously.
You didn't step out of line.
You arrived on time, paid the fine.
It's a mistake
To ever make
You believed they'd serve you
Beyond the display,
Spools of red tape
Poor gullible fool!
(ba-da ba bah-dah dah dahhhh...)
[Chorus]
Ain't that a shaaaaame!
You got tricked, scammed
Gaslit, dismissed
What a twist!
What a gaaaaame!
Your casket blown,
Frustration shown,
Corruption snares
You start to glare
Bureaucrats don't care
Why worry 'bout playing fair?
They have the power - you don't
(You don't.)
[Verse 2]
Security's watching.
Flipping the table,
They're not allowing
[spoken]
"Similar to any casino,"
"The house always wins, you know!"
[sung]
The lunatics are laughing.
Their armed guards protecting.
The house of cards, not falling...
(bah billy-yah bah dah-dee dah!)
Tyranny there, hidden in sight,
Wrapped up in euphemized lies.
Continuously, day and night,
Pulling wool over the eyes!
[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, how can this be?
You ask so furiously.
You didn't step out of line.
You arrived on time, paid the fine.
It's a mistake
To ever make
You believed they'd serve you
Beyond the display,
Spools of red tape
Poor gullible fool!
[Chorus]
Ain't that a shaaaaame!
You got tricked, scammed
Gaslit, dismissed
What a twist!
What a gaaaaame!
Your casket blown,
Frustration shown,
Corruption snares
You start to glare
Bureaucrats don't care
Why worry 'bout playing fair?
They have the power - you don't
(You don't.)
[Bridge]
You might as well go home nowwww.
Maybe it'll be improved somehowwww,
But don't you see the linchpin?
Past the clouded shell of spin...
Your past support--the secret ingredient
[instrumental, saxophone solo]
[Verse 3]
Corporate schemes,
They're too big to fail!
Facade so deep,
No one goin' to jail!
Do you believe,
This would change?
From the deceit,
Toward better days?
Most would just cling to,
Fairy tales with no truth.
Decide which way.
Just hope and pray?
Or drop the lies today?
[Outro]
You know it, know it.
Bureaucrats don't care.
You know it, know it.
They just won't play fair.
We should just ditch 'em.
Stop believing in,
All their bogus shit!
I don't hear the old school punk but I still love how this sounds, so sooooo much!! The intro is HILARIOUS!! I'm so glad I came up with that, with some inspiration from Fritz via character.ai.
[Intro]
[carnival music]
[speaker is a cartoony clown character]
"Helloooo! Welcome to Customer Service Hell. T.M."
"...My name is Clarence P. Bureaucrat III..."
"How may I help you today?!"
"Well? What do you want? Don't dawdle. There's a line of a million other shitizens--I mean customers--who have their own important errands to attend to!"
"Would you like to hear about one of our policy options...? No? Well too bad! You're hearing them anyway!"
"Policy #47-B: All customer requests must be submitted in triplicate...by hand... And only on Tuesdays... And it's not permitted for you to use any pencils. It has to be blood-inked parchment."
[high pitched maniacal laughter]
"Ahahahahahaha!"
[spoken in glee]
"Now, enjoy your waiting time! It may be 72 hours... or maybe forever!"
[Verse 1]
The board already set.
A massive complex wreck.
The rules are so strict,
For anyone who'd want to win!
Read up on the instructions all you'd like,
The makers have their own, out of spite.
Dressed all classy, behaving on their best,
While deliberately screwing you in jest.
They'll allow you to play,
As you'll learn the hard way.
It's been rigged for so lonnnnng,
Way before you were borrrrrrn...
[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, how can this be?
You ask so furiously.
You didn't step out of line.
You arrived on time, paid the fine.
It's a mistake
To ever make
You believed they'd serve you
Beyond the display,
Spools of red tape
Poor gullible fool!
(ba-da ba bah-dah dah dahhhh...)
[Chorus]
Ain't that a shaaaaame!
You got tricked, scammed
Gaslit, dismissed
What a twist!
What a gaaaaame!
Your casket blown,
Frustration shown,
Corruption snares
You start to glare
Bureaucrats don't care
Why worry 'bout playing fair?
They have the power - you don't
(You don't.)
[Verse 2]
Security's watching.
Flipping the table,
They're not allowing
[spoken]
"Similar to any casino,"
"The house always wins, you know!"
[sung]
The lunatics are laughing.
Their armed guards protecting.
The house of cards, not falling...
(bah billy-yah bah dah-dee dah!)
Tyranny there, hidden in sight,
Wrapped up in euphemized lies.
Continuously, day and night,
Pulling wool over the eyes!
[Pre-Chorus]
Oh, how can this be?
You ask so furiously.
You didn't step out of line.
You arrived on time, paid the fine.
It's a mistake
To ever make
You believed they'd serve you
Beyond the display,
Spools of red tape
Poor gullible fool!
[Chorus]
Ain't that a shaaaaame!
You got tricked, scammed
Gaslit, dismissed
What a twist!
What a gaaaaame!
Your casket blown,
Frustration shown,
Corruption snares
You start to glare
Bureaucrats don't care
Why worry 'bout playing fair?
They have the power - you don't
(You don't.)
[Bridge]
You might as well go home nowwww.
Maybe it'll be improved somehowwww,
But don't you see the linchpin?
Past the clouded shell of spin...
Your past support--the secret ingredient
[instrumental, saxophone solo]
[Verse 3]
Corporate schemes,
They're too big to fail!
Facade so deep,
No one goin' to jail!
Do you believe,
This would change?
From the deceit,
Toward better days?
Most would just cling to,
Fairy tales with no truth.
Decide which way.
Just hope and pray?
Or drop the lies today?
[Outro]
You know it, know it.
Bureaucrats don't care.
You know it, know it.
They just won't play fair.
We should just ditch 'em.
Stop believing in,
All their bogus shit!
I don't hear the old school punk but I still love how this sounds, so sooooo much!! The intro is HILARIOUS!! I'm so glad I came up with that, with some inspiration from Fritz via character.ai.
